What matters more??

To most of you, this is probably old news. But, living in Haiti, I usually have no idea what's going on in America. Last year on Black Friday, a man was trampled to death at a Wal-mart in New York. Customers broke through the doors and stampeded in the store. A quote from an article I found, "Witnesses and the police said the doors shattered, and the shrieking mob surged through in a rush for holiday bargains. One worker, Jdimytai Damour, 34, of Queens, was thrown back onto the black linoleum tiles and trampled in the stampede that streamed over and around him."

I don't know about you, but I was shocked when I heard this and read the story. It brought tears to my eyes. Not only because a man lost his life, but because this is who we are. This is what we've become. Does it bother you? We are a people that care more about getting that bargain TV than we care about someone's life. We are selfish and hard-hearted. I'm speaking of the American population in general. And even for those of us that follow Christ and claim that we are changed people, while those terms do not describe who we are, we've all been those things. It's still something we need to constantly check ourselves on. What matters more to us? Do we love like Christ loved? And it's not as simple as, how do we answer those questions-- but, how do we really live?

When I was thinking through all of this, I though of Derek Webb's song, "What Matters More?"

The song touches on legalism and doctrine- how we let those things get in the way of what really matters. Lost souls that are dying. He is NOT saying that certain things, like homosexuality, aren't sins... he is saying that our focus is messed up if we are simply fighting and condemning sinners. Jesus was friends with the prostitutes and tax collectors. He loved them. Okay, but even this is not the point of the song I want to get at. It's the last verse. When we let our debates and differences get in the way of loving people. We talk the Christian talk. But, the way we live- what does that say about what matters more to us??

i went outside.

Saturday night, some of the girls (young ladies, if you will) got together to hang out at the Women's Center. Jonna, one of the midwives, is staying there and invited us all over for pizza and good times. Things got a little more exciting than we had even planned on. Around 8 o'clock, in the middle of a game of "two truths and a lie", Jonna got a call that one of the women in the program was in labor. To read more about the birth, read here. It was a long night, but I rather enjoyed it. We watched a movie. Listened to music. Talked. Got to know each other more. And hanging out around a birthing center, of course we do things like make music videos, check each others hemoglobin, and practice taking blood pressure. My hemoglobin is great, by the way. My blood pressure on the other hand, a little higher than desired.

People told me that exercise is a good thing for high blood pressure (apparently, exercise is a good thing in general). I'm just not a person that is super concerned about my health. BUT I suppose it wouldn't kill me to try to exercise a little bit. So Paige and I partnered up to try running together. Then Vivien and Corrie decided they wanted to run as well. It looks like my high blood pressure has motived all the young ladies in Village Theodat to run. Paige and I planned to run yesterday. It was a good plan. But I forgot to set an alarm... and then she ended up having to go to school earlier than normal. So, it didn't work out. It was a darn good plan though. However, this morning Corrie showed up at the guest house. Vivien had stuff to work on, so it was just Corrie and I that gave this whole running thing a shot. We mostly walked. We ran a little bit. And we weren't out for long. But, I went outside. I think that's a good start. When I got back, Vivien asked "but aren't you motivated now? wasn't it exhilarating?". Hum. I thought about it for a minute. No, not really. Now don't me wrong, I'm glad I did it. And I think I plan to continue it. I just don't see how people actually enjoy running. I don't know though, maybe I'll enjoy it more once I can run and breath at the same time.

out of place

Ever feel totally out of place? For example, a few years ago, some friends and i went on a road trip to Chicago. We decided to walk to Navy Pier from our hotel. It didn't look very far. We were wrong. After walking for over 3 hours (and a 3 hrs that we had not planned on walking, mind you), we were tired and hungry. Someone told us there were places to eat in a building not too far from us. We found it, walked in, eager for food. We didn't see any signs for restaurants. We didn't see any people. So now, here we are, walking aimlessly through this building. We walk into a huge common area, filled with men dressed in suits. Then we saw the banner- welcoming everyone to the Neurosurgeon Convention. Needless to say, we felt slightly out of place.

Another time was when Lizzie Huijskens was in Haiti visiting. Three Angels' lawyer, Rolande, runs her own orphanage. They were celebrating their 40th anniversary. I thought it would be a casual get together. Finger foods. Kids running around. People mingling. Lizzie and I decided to stop by this party. The second we pulled up, we knew we were out of place. The only thing casual about it was Lizzie and I. Everyone else was dressed for a black tie event. We could see everyone seated in another room, listening to someone give a speech. Servers were busy getting the fancy tables ready for the dinner. We stood around awkwardly for a few seconds, then someone told us they would go get Rolande for us so we could say hi. We decided not to stick around to say hi to anyone, we quickly replied, "Um, I think we're just going to leave..." as we quickly ran back to the car.

Okay, and final story. The one that spurred this post. Tuesday, John asked me to attend an adoption workshop that the Embassy was hosting. Alright, sure, no problem. My first mistake, was again assuming something in Haiti would be casual. There is no such thing as a casual party or get together. They like fancy parties. This is a fact I know. I blame no one but myself for making such a stupid mistake. I thought it would be a casual get together of people that run orphanages and process adoptions. Casual was the first mistake. Second mistake was who I thought would be there. It was mostly French people with fancy names and fancy job descriptions. There was a Haitian judge that works in the Port au Prince court. The Consul General was there. I'm not even sure who he is or what he does, but it sounds important. The first speaker spoke only French. Finally, a few minutes after he spoke, someone went back and repeated everything he said in English. And from there on out, everything was translated from French to English and English to French. As soon as I realized I was under-dressed, I took a seat in the back corner. I spoke to no one. Until a large man came and sat next to me. He shook my hand and introduced himself as someone with the Embassy. Adding to the fact I was aware I was not dressed appropriate, I had a cold. Not a big deal, I know. But, when you can't breath out of your nose, probably have snot dripping down your face, and have to leave your mouth gapping open so you can breath, there is just something about it that makes you feel even more unattractive. It doesn't matter how nice you actually look, you will just still feel like you look like crap. Now, don't get me wrong. I really don't mind these types of events. If I'm dressed properly, I can pretend to be professional and act like I fit in. However, not dressed properly, I just feel like a kid that is somewhere I don't belong. A little out of place.

beautiful stranger

I was at the US Embassy a couple of weeks ago. If you've ever been there, then you know you are never there for a short amount of time. There is always plenty of waiting. Sometimes it's annoying and frustrating. You've got other places to go, things to do. But, sometimes I like waiting (yeah, feel free to remind me that next time I have to go there). I love observing people. "People watching", if you will. The airport is of course one of the most interesting, entertaining places to do this. But, I'm telling you, the US Embassy in Haiti is up there on the list, too. On this most recent trip there, I often found myself staring at this one particular Haitian lady and her daughter (a casual stare, mind you. not one of the 'keep-staring-even-after-they-notice-you-are-staring' stares). This woman was absolutely beautiful. Gorgeous. You could put her on the cover of a magazine. Her daughter, probably around 8, was just as beautiful. I find myself often enthralled by the beauty of a Haitian woman. At the Embassy, everyone is dressed in their best. It might not always match. Sometimes it's see-through. It doesn't fit right. But, it's likely their only "nice" outfit. The same one they wear to church every Sunday. (I don't think it matters what you look like/dress like going to church. However, we've seemed to push our Westernized thinking on to the Haitians- you have to dress nice to go to church. Often times, a Haitian will say they can't go to church because they don't have anything good enough to wear.) They aren't necessarily dressed super fancy. But, they put on the best that they have. Do their hair up nice. Pour on the perfume/cologne. And they seem to walk a little straighter, their head held a little higher. Just the same, you wonder what their life is really like. When they take off the nice clothes, go back home... what is life like for them? Another place where I often ask this questions is at the Women's Program. On Tuesdays, women come in with their child under a year old for a Child Development class. On Thursdays, it's Pre-natals. Some of the women look tired. Is this the only place they get to sit down, rest, and not be working? Some women crack jokes. Some listen carefully, to this basic information they've never heard before. Some fall asleep. I love to see them smile. They have beautiful smiles.

It's so easy to just walk right by people. But these are people. God's beautiful creations (have over-used the word "beautiful" in this post yet?). We all have our own story. And each story matters. I thought of a song by Rebecca St. James, here a some of the lyrics: "Do you see me?
The question’s in her eyes, Do you relate to the pain I can’t disguise? Oh, look beyond what you see, The outside is not all there is....God, I hear You calling out to me, In the voices of the least of these, Calling me to reach beyond my world, To the beautiful stranger, Beautiful Stranger...". These people that we see, do we take the time to actually see them? To get to know them? Which brings me to another song, and then I'm done. It's "Take a Little Time" by Jeremy Camp. You should be able to listen to it, and the lyrics are below. (sorry, i tried w/ no success to upload just the music. had to do a youtube video instead.)

"Take A Little Time"

I picture all the things that I have seen,
All the broken hearts and tainted memories,
All I see are, all these needs.
I'm tired of my selfish tragedies.
It's time that we show,
The hope that we all know.

And, take just a little time,
To give your hand,
See the world,
And take just a little time and try to understand,
That there's more going on,
Than what these eyes can see.

I came across this torn down empty street.
How helpless that I felt,
A burning urgency,
And all I see in front of me,
Are all the faces fading from this vacant scene.
It's time that we show,
The hope that we all know.

And take just a little time,
To give your hand,
See the world,
And take just a little time and try to understand,
That there's more going on,
Than what these eyes can see.

I know it all seems complicated,
There's nothing more that could be stated,
Now, is the time to kneel,
Reaching out to what is real,
So many times I've hesitated,
How much I feel my heart is aching, now.
Ohh, now.

And take just a little time,
To give your hand.
Take just a little time,
To give your hand,
See the world,
And take just a little time and try to understand,
That there's more going on,
Than what these eyes can see.

let's talk about eyebrows.

This is a random post. about eyebrows. 

i just think it's kinda funny. how much time, energy and even money we put into them. our eyebrows. you can pluck them. wax them. hair removal. laser. shave them. or even do "eyebrow threading" to shape them. the options are endless (okay, probably not endless- those 6 are the only options i can think of). 

and isn't it just silly? i don't much care about my eyebrows, but i waste time and money on other things just as petty.  no worries, i'm not going to get all preachy here.  my purpose isn't to make everyone feel bad. but just think about it. everyday ppl get told they have HIV. cancer. their life changes as the result of an accident. ppl stave to death. child slaves. orphans. rape.  even more devastating-- people die everyday without knowing who Christ is.

and we worry about the shape of a little bit of hair above our eyes. i'm not telling you to stop plucking. i'm going to keep tweezing. especially if you have a unibrow, i would recommend that you keep plucking or waxing or whatever you gotta do.  i'm just saying we need to remember there are bigger fish to fry. there are bigger issues.  we so easily get caught up in things like eyebrows, hair color, tanning, weight, manicures--- and there is nothing wrong with those things in themselves-- but in the end, they are meaningless. so is it not foolish to obsess and spend chunks of money on things that ultimately do not matter? should we not strive to be more heaven-minded?